Eight going on 18- does your tween feel more like a teen?
I know, you thought you had more time.
Puberty isn’t waiting for middle school anymore. For many kids, the changes are starting much earlier — sometimes as early as third grade.
And for a lot of parents, that’s surprising.
You’re not imagining it — the data backs it up. The average age of a first period is dropping. Breast buds, body odor, mood swings, and growth spurts are now popping up as early as ages 8 or 9. And while that might seem young, our kids are living it — whether we’re ready or not.
Why It Catches So Many Parents Off Guard
Most of us didn’t go through puberty this early. So when our kids start needing deodorant or asking for a bra in elementary school, we’re thrown off.
We think we have more time.
But the truth is, puberty starts in the brain before it shows up in the body. That means changes in moods, attitudes, and emotional outbursts often arrive before the growth spurts, body hair, or acne.
And because it starts gradually — and earlier than expected — kids may feel confused, even embarrassed, about what’s happening. Especially if no one’s talking about it.
Quick Reality Check: What Early Puberty Might Look Like…
Your 8-year-old is suddenly stinky after practice
The first signs of acne showing up– right along with new insecurities
Mood swings that catch you both off guard
Turning to Google with big questions about their bodies instead of coming to you
Closing their door more often, and needing more privacy
Your daughter asks for a bra- in third grade
Your Kid Needs You to Talk About This (Yes, You!)
Most of us didn’t grow up with open conversations about puberty. We got weird euphemisms, outdated books, or dead silence.
Let’s not pass that silence down.
Kids don’t need perfect explanations. They need you to:
Use the actual words — yes, all of them. That sends a powerful message: your child’s body is not shameful. It also helps them communicate clearly, advocate for themselves, and feel more confident as changes happen.
Keep the door open for questions.
Normalize what’s happening. Talk about body changes in small, everyday moments.
Respond with support, not shame — even when your kid tries to shut the conversation down. Tell them: “This is part of growing up, and I’m here for all of it.”
You don’t have to do it perfectly, you just have to start with the talk, and keep it going.
Earlier Puberty Doesn’t Mean They’re Ready — Emotionally
One of the biggest challenges? Kids’ bodies may start changing years before their thoughts, feelings and age are ready to catch up.
The part of the brain responsible for decision-making, emotional regulation, and impulse control is still under construction — and will be for a while (age 26 to be exact).
That means we have kids who are still emotionally in elementary school… navigating bodies that are starting to feel more like middle or high school. It’s confusing for them — and for us.
Puberty Doesn’t Have to Be a Crisis
It can actually be an opportunity — a chance to build trust, deepen conversations, and help your child feel good (not awkward) about growing up.
When you respond to their questions with honesty and curiosity instead of panic or discomfort, you’re showing them that this isn’t something to be ashamed of — it’s something to understand and own.
Puberty might be starting earlier — but with the right support, your kid can grow into it feeling informed, confident, and connected to you.
Ready to feel more confident navigating puberty with your child?
Then, join me for two special events created just for early supporters!
📍 April 17 — at Aspen Academy in Greenwood Village, CO (5:30–6:30 PM) Join me in person for a free talk on middle childhood. Just preorder the book to reserve your spot! RSVP Here!
Can’t make it in person? No worries.
💻 April 27 — Live Webinar I’ll be hosting a one-hour virtual event where I’ll dive deeper into the book’s key themes, provide you with actionable guidance and answer your questions in real time.
How to join:
1️⃣ Register for the webinar via THIS LINK
2️⃣ Submit your proof of purchase HERE
Once approved, you’ll receive a confirmation with everything you need to attend!
🎙️ PLUS: I’m on the Authentic Parenting Podcast!
Check out a brand-new episode on the Authentic Parenting Podcast— it’s my first interview dedicated entirely to the book!
👉 Listen here or find it on Apple Podcasts, Spotify Podcasts, or Amazon Music — wherever you get your podcasts.